Dashavatar (GAM104)
Dashavatar is the story of… it's complete nonsense. It's nonsense. It's like a toddler on acid telling you a two hour story. It's ridicu—they should just call it "And then… hello, today." It's like a baby David Cross on acid telling a story. Fucking crazy. This is a series of Hindu legends about the first nine incarnations of Vishnu, in cartoon form—in kid cartoon form. But they're just like... weird old fables that were designed before stories made any fucking sense and only work if you don't visualize them, which is what a cartoon is. Type: Scripture on Film Opening Phrase Where each week we sample another selection from Christian cinema, except when Christian cinema just isn't insane enough for us. How Bad Was It? It was fucking awesome, that's how bad it was! First of all, it's on Netflix; look, I know we tell you "Yeah, you don't have to watch this one" or "You can watch this one"—no no no no. Two years of my life: "I don't know if I care about Jesus", people do a thing, "I care about Jesus now", and then I fuckin' peak it right here with this shit. This whole episode could just be us describing the movie—not a single joke—we could just describe the pictures. There's not a boring second, there's awesome musical numbers… pause the podcast, watch this movie, and take the ride with us. It's on Netflix! Best Worst *Heath: ...angry animals. *Eli: ...surprise, it's Vishnu. *Noah: ...montage; and also, second best-worst montage; and also, third best-worst montage. Notes *It's always fucking Vishnu. *Rated R on Google Play. Jokes *"The following sentences literally occur in my notes, and again these are not 'oh, I just came up with a funny thing to say' type notes, these are just 'keeping track of the action if screen' notes. These were my three favorites: 1. So the demon jumps into the sea to fight a water pig with his giant lollipop...2. And now a evil seahorse with a mohawk flies through outer space… And finally 3. Also, dolphins are helping the chipmunks build a bridge for the army of monkeys in diapers.' It's like telling someone—this whole episode is going to be like telling you about a dream I had three weeks ago. So, as we go though this, understand that we are trying to squeeze three thousand years of Hindu crazy into a two hour episode. Imagine we watched a cartoon that was just the Bible, but we'd never read the fucking Bible, and had no idea what kind of crazy we were getting into." (3:50) *"So, he puts his sister in prison with her husband, and he's like 'Quick, have eight babies so I can kill all of them.' And they do! And the reason they do that is so we can get—honest to God, I am not fucking kidding, it's in the movie—a baby killing montage. I had to go get my wife, right? Because I have a general rule when I watch movies that if there's a baby killing montage, I have to stop for a while. So, I go to my wife and she's like 'Are you taking a break?', and I'm like 'Yeah, there's a baby killing montage'; she's like, "No there wasn't', and I'm like 'No, come here: there's a baby killing montage.' So, they show like, a series of babies—now, we're only seeing the shadow, so it's not violent—but they're killing these babies in ridiculously comical ways, and apparently the guy has to kill each baby in a different way." (1:27:08) Interstitials *"Oh, we're Hindu now." (6:58) *Platinum Night Live Show Ad (1:01:59) Tropes *Probably plenty of Hindu tropes, but I have no idea. Links *Episode on Audioboom *Film on YouTube 1 *IMDB Category:Episodes Category:Hindu